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-Mother Theresa
Today was one of those days that occur every so often wherein I walk around muttering under my breath and asking the good Lord why in the world He allowed such half-baked, unprepared, mentally deficient people to become the providers and authority figures over more than an average number of helpless children.
No, really, why?
As we pulled into our driveway late today I could tell that the next few hours might be challenging. My attitude was ... how shall we say?? .... "edgy", and we were behind schedule. I scrambled to make the dinner that Paige requested, begged everyone to be responsible and do their homework without me having to crab, plead, and bribe. I told Lydia and Phoebe if they didn't fight I'd feed them dinner. Troy took off to go to the Harbor House to check on those 8 teenagers and 8 kids and see how things were there. Time got away and all of a sudden we're eating dinner at 7:30. (We usually eat at 5:30 and go to bed at 8p)
Exactly zero of six kids got any one on one time from either of us tonight. I cannot confidently say that the homework is done well or even at all. I asked them to wash butt-cracks, arm pits, and feet and at this late hour can neither confirm nor deny if they succeeded at that.
We're in a streak. It's not a winning streak. We're staring at too many needs that we only half meet. There have been too many nights where all of a sudden it is after bedtime and we're not where we need to be with homework, human interaction, helping one another, and probably even some other H words that don't come to mind right now.
We had bright ideas about doing special Advent devotions with our kids. (As in every night.) Tonight made night two in a row without devotions. I believe Troy actually said "It is too late, this won't work." (I did not disagree. They were already cornholio and we hadn't read one single word yet.)
"Advent" means something different here. Advent at our house is a time when the kids are anticipating the arrival of capable grown ups to run the show and create some order.
It could be a long season.
When I plopped down to answer emails and lament our cruddy parenting ... I was pleasantly surprised by two things.
One, this fun photo Evan posted that he took at the Harbor House.
Two, this note was sitting on my desk -
"Hey mom here is a dollar it's from me Hope.
I give you permision to do anything you want with it.
love Hope"
Suddenly everything seems better.
10 comments:
Sending hugs and prayers your way, Dear Tara! You remain my Hero! <3
That pic is soooooooo sweet. So sweet.
And if it makes you feel any better (in case the euphoria from the dollar wears off), I'm in same boat. Except I'm in a first world country with less than half as many children. And all I'm trying to do is GET READY to go to a third world country for a few weeks, and I am screwing up at every turn. God is even blessing me like bonkers, and I still can't shake the edgy (and edgy is too mild a word, but I don't want to admit to anything more awful).
Anyway. Praying for you. Thanks for your honesty (even if you're keeping the worst of it to yourself like I like to do).
p.s. My "word verification" word is "toribl." Yes, that's probably a good word for me right now. Toribl.
you rock and you don't even know it. be good to you...
Fact 1: It does not work to cuss and raise your voice at your children in order to get them to love Advent Devotionals and Jesus.
Fact 2: You must be fairly secure to live in a place where boobs are hanging out of clothing in front of your husband pretty much 24/7/ 365. You must also let go of thinking it will ever be different. Culture wins!
These facts are born of some rumbles with cold hard reality people, trust me on this.
We are in the midst of packing up our entire house for furlough, one child brought home lice from school yesterday, our main vehicle has been in the shop for going for two months, and I can confidently say that you are not alone in this crazy chaos! I feel pretty much like a failure most days. I'll pray for you today, Tara!
I completely realize that you have had a less than stellar couple of days with your kiddos (at least it probably feels that way) ...but just to cheer you up, an almost 39 year old woman 4000 miles away nearly peed herself laughing (that would be me) at the description of bedtime, "devotions", and the very appropriate use of the word cornholio...although I never watched B and Bhead so, who knows what they were really referring to. I'd rather not think about it. Just be encouraged that, unlike some of us who have to invent ways of showing our kids what it means to be an actual follower of Jesus, you guys are living and breathing what it means to "take up your cross and follow" Him. I am inspired and challenged every time I read your blog, and I
know your kids are seeing what really matters ...that you are being the hands and feet of Christ in a tangible way. :) (At least one out of every four nights where we try to do devotions with our kids, we end up slamming the Bible shut and saying in a slightly too loud voice "Enough! That's IT! BEDTIME...and if you're lucky, you'll get tucked in" So, we're all a work in progress...more work than progress, sometimes. :)
This blog post was classic and the comments were pretty darn funny too! Anybody with lots of kids can identify!
Heh.
Sorry. It's just life. And, darn it, life is funny. I mean, not always DURING but usually after.
I love your Fact 1 & Fact 2 and they are both so true.
Tonight we began Day 1 of our Advent Calendar. I ordered it on Amazon 2 days ago b/c I'm so awesome I FORGOT ABOUT ADVENT and the fact that I've wanted to Advent (yep, just used it as a verb) for the last 7 years.
The littlest 3 kids didn't even get to Advent b/c they were so annoying I couldn't handle them a second longer. The older 3 got a very grumpy Dad version of Advent while Mom pecked away at the way-past-due Newsletter that's due, oh...2 months ago.
So yeah. You're normal. Well, I mean not NORMAL but you know what I mean.
cornholio- best use of the adjective ever. love love love. so much so that i'm laughing in hysterics over all of this.
and then the sucker punch was reading the note from hope and then they mushy gushy tears started.
Love the picture!
And, that precious gift from Hope. So sweet!
My dear husband pulled out a book to read for Advent ... and, it too has only happened 1 night this week. Such is life with a house FULL of children.
Hope you have a BLESSED weekend (with an Advent devotion or two thrown in for good measure).
Laurel
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