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If you allow yourself to Google search your every.fleeting.thought. - you end up not only wasting massive amounts of time on-line, but also on occasion you accidentally learn something.
The usefulness of said accidental learning is up for debate. But still ...
I'm sharing these interesting (and useful) things I read the other night.
As a result of thinking to myself "Huh, I bet at least a couple of our kids will have interracial marriages someday", I was researching and reading here about interracial marriages in history and I came across the story of Joseph Philippe Larouche. It was all quite fascinating.
"Attitudes towards Interracial marriage have changed dramatically, in just the last generation. In the United States it was just 43 years ago when interracial marriage was made fully legal in all 50 states. Today, in many countries, interracial marriage is commonplace and most don’t even give it a second thought. However, as we all know, it wasn’t always this way in the past. This list includes individuals who didn’t let the prejudice of society make their decisions in life, and also paved the way for interracial couples in the future."
(check the link above)
One story was about a Haitian man that died on the Titanic 100 years ago ...
The usefulness of said accidental learning is up for debate. But still ...
I'm sharing these interesting (and useful) things I read the other night.
As a result of thinking to myself "Huh, I bet at least a couple of our kids will have interracial marriages someday", I was researching and reading here about interracial marriages in history and I came across the story of Joseph Philippe Larouche. It was all quite fascinating.
"Attitudes towards Interracial marriage have changed dramatically, in just the last generation. In the United States it was just 43 years ago when interracial marriage was made fully legal in all 50 states. Today, in many countries, interracial marriage is commonplace and most don’t even give it a second thought. However, as we all know, it wasn’t always this way in the past. This list includes individuals who didn’t let the prejudice of society make their decisions in life, and also paved the way for interracial couples in the future."
(check the link above)
One story was about a Haitian man that died on the Titanic 100 years ago ...
Mr Joseph Philippe Lemercier Laroche was born in Cap Haitien, Haiti on 26 May 1886. In 1901, at age 15, he left Haiti and travelled to Beauvais, France, where he hoped to join the high school to study engineering.
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| Laroche Family |
While visiting nearby Villejuif Joseph met Miss Juliette Lafargue. After Joseph graduated and got his degree, he and Juliette were married in March of 1908. Their daughter Simonne was born 19 February 1909; a second daughter, Louise, was born prematurely on 2 July 1910, and suffered many subsequent medical problems.
Racial discrimination prevented Joseph Laroche from obtaining a high-paying job in France. Since the family needed more money to cope with Louise's medical bills, Joseph decided to return to Haiti to find a better-paying engineering job, the move being planned for 1913.
In March 1912, however, Juliette discovered that she was pregnant, so she and Joseph decided to leave for Haiti before her pregnancy became too far advanced for travel. Joseph's mother in Haiti bought them steamship tickets on the La France as a welcome present, but the line's strict policy regarding children caused them to transfer their booking to the Titanic's second class.
On April 10 the Laroche family took the train from Paris to Cherbourg in order to board the brand new liner later that evening.
Joseph - who is thought to have been the only black passenger on the Titanic - died in the sinking but his family were saved, possibly in lifeboat 14.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I am curious, do most folks think attitudes toward interracial marriage have changed dramatically? I don't think I know the answer. I'm probably not the person that should determine the answer. Paige was shocked; her jaw dropped to the floor when she realized that it became legal in all 50 states so recently. That is pretty flippin crazy.
There is an ongoing struggle in Haiti with lighter skin people seen as better, smarter, more beautiful and/or capable. To us it seems that prejudice and race-based hierarchy is overt and deeply rooted. It's discouraging to interact with it and feel powerless to change it.
Over the last month our kids have been learning about slavery and the civil rights movement at school. They come home to share what they've learned. Their responses and questions have been precious, insightful, and heartbreaking.
Thursday's blog history lesson has now concluded.
There is an ongoing struggle in Haiti with lighter skin people seen as better, smarter, more beautiful and/or capable. To us it seems that prejudice and race-based hierarchy is overt and deeply rooted. It's discouraging to interact with it and feel powerless to change it.
Over the last month our kids have been learning about slavery and the civil rights movement at school. They come home to share what they've learned. Their responses and questions have been precious, insightful, and heartbreaking.
Thursday's blog history lesson has now concluded.
17 comments:
I read the story of Mr. Laroche's and his family a few weeks back and it[s very fascinating. Interracial marriage is something that dramatically changed after a few celebrities started to get married. (in my opinion). I don't have a problem with it, but my parent's might but it's not a big deal. They would love to keep the line flowing but the last decision is mine.
Wow. That's some amazing stuff.
I've heard about racism between African-Americans here in the US based on skin color as well. It hasn't been institutionalized or overt, for the post part, but it's definitely an issue here as well.
I have to agree that is pretty interesting information. And I have to say I think quite frequently about who my kids will marry. Not because I care if their spouse is white, black, Asian, etc. but because I am curious about who they will marry and how race will play into. And I have wondered several times if we will ever have to deal with someone's parents not wanting their child to date my son/daughter. (Mostly I think about it with my son because he is probably going to be a tall, strong black man which carries all sorts of connotations.) One thing I am thankful for is that as teachers, our family is well known in our community so perhaps knowing the family our kids came from will help. Right now, my daughter who is 5 is pretty sure she is going to marry one of her friends who is also 5 and white. He seems to think the same thing about her. His mom, who is one of my close friends, has not said a single thing about race. (Not because we are planning to marry them off. I just think there has been plenty of opportunities for her to say or act in a way that indicates she is uncomfortable with her child marrying a black person. I think I was just worried that even though I know this family well, that there still might be a chance there would be an offhanded comment that indicated discomfort. For me at least, we have not had to deal with overt, in your face racism. It's the little comments that white people say where they often don't think about how they sound, those are the ones we've heard. Thankfully, never at our kids but occasionally directed at other ethnic groups so I was kind of thinking that at some point we might hear something similar in regards to interracial marriage.)
woah! I just read this article this week about this: http://yourlife.usatoday.com/sex-relationships/marriage/story/2012-02-16/US-rate-of-interracial-marriage-hits-record-high/53109980/1
But I didn't know the history of the Titatic story at all!
I'm 26 and I don't know anybody in my generation who thinks interracial marriage is wrong who doesn't say as the reason "my parents/older generation wouldn't approve". That is, the only reason people in my generation i know might object is because of the older generation. I know because I'm in an interracial relationship. I saw a fascinating thing on televison the other day where a study was done on how much influence that parents have on their children's choice of a future spouse. The researchers were shocked to discover how impactful it was... I'm not. I think though that when my generation's children are grown, the parents won't have the same concerns, so I think we're just one or two generations away from it being a non-issue. Not sure if I expressed myself entirely articulately but I find it interesting myself.
It's funny that I came across this story recently, too. :)
I have proof that racism is a completely learned thing. When I was in college, I dated a black man for a short time. I didn't tell my mother directly, because I knew that if my grandma found out, she'd be angry. When we talked of it in vague terms, my mom said she would worry about the children from a mixed marriage. Years later, my grandma ends up with Alzheimer's. Her favorite caregiver is a woman from Nigeria. Then she meets my adopted Haitian son and thinks he's the cutest thing ever. She had forgotten her prejudice along with everything else. Now, my brother is married to a woman that is half Japanese. My mom isn't remotely worried about the kids. :)
Like kayder above, I've often look for racist comments from the parents of the kids my kids hang out with. My son is gaga over a white girl and she likes him back. I wondered what her mom thought of that (they are 9, btw). At the Christmas program, she hunted my son down and thanked him for being such a good friend to her daughter. I breathed a sigh of relief. It's just one parent, but I am now more hopeful.
My husband is Puerto Rican and I'm about as pasty as they come. That being said, he's actually 50% Puerto Rican and 50% Polish so he doesn't necessarily look Hispanic. We've never encountered any prejudice but I'm guessing that has to do with the fact that he looks Polish. However, I have a racist extended family (that we haven't talked to in 10 years due to other issues) and my grandfather made it clear to us at a young age we shouldn't even have "non-white" friends, let alone date anyone. I think that prejudice will always be present against interracial couples but not nearly to the degree it used to be.
I was raised being told that interracial marriages were a horrible idea. I heard the line from Fiddler on the Roof... A fish may marry a bird, but where will they live? I daily struggle to view some other races as hardworking as mine. I never question intelligence or the fact that all are created by God, just the level of hardworkingness, which is so prideful. And yes, my grandparents are so incredibly racsist. Except now in her old age, my grandmother decided that she wasn't racist so she voted for Obama to prove it. Lol.
There are definitely some areas of the country which are still very racist. I have a white friend who is married to black man and they are stationed at an Army base in southern Missouri. They have found that when they are out and about around town, many people will not speak with them...unless her husband is in his uniform, and then they are very welcoming. I thought that was really odd! Also, some friends of ours from college were an inter-racial couple and were not allowed to serve with a particular mission organization because they didn't allow inter-racial couples to serve on the mission field. Our friends found another mission organization who would send them and have been happily married and happily serving for over 20 years. They are the sweetest couple and have awesome kids!
HBO did a film on The Loving Family (their actual name was Loving) and their legal battle which went all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court. This article talks about it:
http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/02/14/2639770/a-loving-legacy.html
You might want to consider watching it and having Paige watch it on-line via the HBO website.
I hate it when we're in Cambodia and we get complimented on our "beautiful" white skin. I always say something like, "Oh, I think your skin is sooooo much prettier!" (which is completely true), but they brush me off. I always wonder how our black friends would be received if they came to visit, and it makes me sad. Dumb, dumb, dumb.
But the ignorant racists in America are the people who really get my goat.
Anyway. I asked you months ago if I could have Isaac for a future son-in-law, and you never got back to me. So can I?
I can remember the first time I realized people thought there was a difference in people because of their skin color. I was in the 6th grade. I was surrounded by different skin colors and yet I somehow wasn't touched by racism (being white in America, and growing up in an AWESOME environment are probably two of the biggest factors there!
I have continually had friends with people of many different backgrounds. I seem to be wired to work that way...I just like people. period. (well, most of them.)
I started travelling to Haiti in 2005. In 2010, I was living in Chicago and met a man from Haiti who was living there. A month or so later, we started dating...6 months after that I moved to Haiti...he stayed in the US. 3 months after I went to Haiti I went home for a week and he proposed. He came back to Haiti with me. I hadn't thought about the fact that we had different skin colors much...not much at all, in fact that thing that I thought was most amazing was the fact that we were having one of the most significant relationships of my life, mostly in his third language. The first time I felt judged was when I introduced him to American missionaries in Port Au Prince...at church no-less. I was very happy to be newly engaged, and I had judgemental looks, words, and behaviors from missionaries. (I won't go into details here...but if you want to know I'll email you) Not Cool. But I was ok with it...because honestly, those people don't know us...they didn't know our story. How could they make a informed judgement on it. So I let it go.
I do remember being terrified that his mother, in Haiti, wouldn't like me. I thought she WOULD think of me as different because I am a Blan...but honestly, I love her...and she loves me. I love sitting with her and stumbling through kreyol and listening to her repeat everything I say, either because she's trying to understand my kreyol, or because she's suprised I know how to say thing...she's great. Typing this makes me miss her.
My husbands friends have been incredibly welcoming to me and don't treat me like an outsider at all. Very respectful and fun.
The bottom line is, I love my husband. I love that I live in a world where I know that we can walk down the street and we don't really worry about stares (even when I stick out like a sore thumb in Haiti)
I do think we live in a world where bi-racial relationships are more common (Several of my friends are in bi-racial marriages...we seriously look like a club when we go out together.) I do not think Racism is dead. There will always be someone in this world who judges, black, white, red, gold, whatever...
I think your children stand a pretty fantastic chance of growing up as people who love people for people. And I think that's what it's about...giving people eyes to see people for who they are.
Ok, I just wrote a ton...and that's kind of silly. Because this is just my experience...for every interracial couple there's a different experience.
I agree, it depends on what part of the country you are in. I live near Seattle and interracial relationships and marriages are pretty common here. There are at least two couples in my neighborhood that have a spouse of a different race. I know that in other parts of the country though it is not common and people are questioned/looked down on for it. I'm in my 20's and don't have a problem with interracial marriages at all. However, I will also agree with other commenters that the older generation(s) do have problems with it and a lot of younger people will not date/marry anyone of a different race because of pressure from their parents or other relatives. I think this will dissipate once we are the older generation- I wouldn't care who my kids married as long as they were happy!
Thanks for posting that article by the way-that was fascinating!
Crazy, the Laroche family is still a very prominent family in Cap-Haitian.
Daryl
Based on experiences in the six + years living here in Haiti ... We both think racism is a bigger problem here than it was where we're from (Minnesota). It would vary between the 'elite' vs. the poor but there is truly an issue.
Obviously being two white people we cannot speak with tons of intelligence about the interracial marriage part. I do think like many of you said that whatever your parents taught you does play out in your head as you try to figure out your own attitudes. When Paige started dating a Haitian young man from school I got to figure out my own predispositions and examine what those were about. It is hard to be truly honest with yourself about what you believe until you are given a chance to face it in a more first hand way.
Daryl - That is nutty! Do you know them very well? I cannot imagine how that all played out ... the first boat not taking the kids and then the second boat sinking! The wife and two girls lived a long time ... I could not find any info on the baby she was pregnant with at the time of the sinking of the Titanic so I wonder if that baby was later lost?
This past Sunday our pastor spoke on this issue. He was preaching out of Deuteronomy and about how the Israelite was supposed to be separate from the people they were to conquer in the promised land. He said that they were not to intermarry based not on race, but based on faith. God didn't want His people to be distracted and drawn away from Him to the idols of the other groups. Our church has a large senior citizen population, I was was proud of our pastor to clearly make the point that as far as marriages go today, we should take into account potential spouses faith, not their race.
Here is where Christ makes the difference. Christ does not call us to a prudent life, but to a God-centered, Christ-exalting, justice-advancing, counter-cultural, risk-taking life of love and courage. Will it be harder to be married to another race, and will it be harder for the kids? Maybe. Maybe not. But since when is that the way a Christian thinks? Life is hard. And the more you love the harder it gets.
It’s hard to take a child to the mission field. The risks are huge. It’s hard to take a child and move into a mixed neighborhood where he may be teased or ridiculed. It’s hard to help a child be a Christian in a secular world where his beliefs are mocked. It’s hard to bring children up with standards: “you will not dress like that, and you will not be out that late.” It’s hard to raise children when dad or mom dies or divorces. And that’s a real risk in any marriage. Whoever said that marrying and having children was to be trouble free? It’s one of the hardest things in the world. It just happens to be right and rewarding.
Christians are people who move toward need and truth and justice, not toward comfort and security. Life is hard. But God is good. And Christ is strong to help.
There is so much more to say about the challenges and blessings of interracial marriage. But we are out of time. I hope to write more. Suffice it say now by way of practical conclusion: at Bethlehem we will not underestimate the challenges of interracial marriage or transracial adoption (they go closely together). We will celebrate the beauty, and we will embrace the burden. Both will be good for us and good for the world and good for the glory of God.
from http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/sermons/racial-harmony-and-interracial-marriage
Had these head conversations about our own two girls being raised in the DR
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